Federal Researve says to US Economy, "We got your back, dog"

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=D8SEC4NG0&show_article=1

Dow Jones got you down? Crude prices seem a little high? Never fear! The Federal Reserve Bank is Here! You know them, right? The one that used to be run by a frumpy looking leprechaun (that's a terrible thing to say about Alan Greenspan... or is it?). Well everyone can take a deep breath and know that the economy is safe for one more day. The "Fed" has promised to keep America afloat by lowering interest rates should the stock market continue to fall. I can't decide whether I'm excited or not? Lower interest rates seem cool I guess, I mean they are lower. Then again it's still up to your bank to decide what your interest rate will be (I'm looking at you college freshman who got too many credit cards..) I'll do whatever they want. If they want me to continue blindly purchasing expensive items I think I need, then sobeit (I always imagined this as one word).